A Night on Sunset Strip – 14/2/15

Hello LA, you’re up way past your bed time aren’t you?

You better slip on something comfortable, I know I had.

No soul to share a movie with? No one to spend the night out? Just plain sick of chocolate? No problem. I’m here for you.

If you’re new to town, or new to this whole radio thing, let me put in a few words. This is A Night on Sunset Strip, and I’m Jessica, the only girl who’d spend time with you on Valentine’s Day, and leave first thing in the morning. Even so, no need to be sad, since at least I have the courtesy, and the salary, to pretend to be interested in what all of you have to say, with a little help from my friend Bordeaux here of course. Cul sec!

I see the board’s already lighting up. Aren’t I the popular girl? Let’s see…

Line 2, you’re up.

“Hey Jess.”

And who might you be?

“Name’s Andre.”

Hello, Andre. What’s keeping you up tonight?

“I’ve been working on a movie set, and I just got home.”

Oh? What movie might that be?

“It’s an… independent movie, you probably never heard of.”

Surely you could spare a gal a name?

“It’s… a Lebanese movie.”

Bsharet ennak ma bta3ref hay ayya logha?

“Er.. yes, absolutely!”

Enta ahbal.

Alright, line 3, what’s keeping you up at night?

“Hey Jess, it’s Drew.”

Hello again, Drew. I see you’re out and about as usual.

“Right, I got something big for ya, and I’m serious this time.”

I’m always ready to lend an ear.

“Ok. So I finally figured out the how Micheal Jackson died last year!”

It’s 2015, Drew.

“Yes, but hear me out here. Micheal Jackson fake his death in 2009, see? He did it because the media was going down on him. That’s why his doctor was never properly prosecuted. They were all in on it, everyone knows that.”

Fascinating…

“But, Micheal actually did die last year, after half a decade of being on the run. The governors that’s also the father of one of the kids hired a private investigator. They tracked Micheal down last year in Santa Monica!”

So you’re saying they got their hands on Micheal?

“No no. It was actually the doctor! Micheal was mad at him for leaving a paper trail that led to the discovery. He threatened to reveal everything, and the doctor got scared and killed him. But since he’s already declared dead, no one ever found out! It’s the perfect crime!”

And how, pray tell, did you come across this information?

“I have a friend who knows the private detective. He told me everything!”

Thank you Drew.

Well that concludes our news section of the night. Since I’ll like to get paid, we’re going to run some commercials. But don’t worry boys, I’m just getting warmed up, in all the right ways.

“Have you ever felt like there’s something missing in your life? Every time you go to a fast food joint, the only thing you can think of is how this chicken you’re eating doesn’t taste like those your ‘ye ol’ grandmother used to make? Well, suffer no more, as we bring you Hell’s Chicken! Never again shall you wonder what it’d be like if your grandmother would still be around cooking you meals, since you can get the feel as if she’s right here! Come to Hell’s Chicken for America’s very own deluxe gormet family style never before seen, heard or eat chicken. It will never go bad, guaranteed to fill you up with every meal, is very balanced in diet, and is loved by all the kids. But it will cause cancer.”

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